Reflection of the Year

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve.  This is always a good time for me to step back and reflect on my past year.

As far as my own journey goes, I didn't have any big "AHA!" moments for the year.  No big personal discoveries or lessons learned.  It's been a slow year for that.

Something big DID happen, though!  Fiancé asked me to marry him in the sweetest way possible.  I am the luckiest person in the world to have the sweetest, most caring, most thoughtful man to want to be mine forever.  It's crazy to me to think about that!  What's even better is that we started the process of wedding planning and found our venue.  I also found my dress, which I know will be a special moment for me and my mom.

As far as things that I did...  The biggest thing that sticks out to me is the group vacation I went on with Fiancé and his friends.  We traveled to Cape Cod for a weekend and spent part of one of the days revisiting Martha's Vineyard.  It was a great time connecting with Fiances friends, and for the first time in 3 years I got into ocean water and actually swam! 

The beginning of 2015 brought snowpocalypse, and who knows if that will happen again.  So much snow, so many Monday classes missed, and lots of muscles trained to walk in snow.  Jurassic World came out and it was the first time I was so excited to see a movie that I went to see it twice.  My birthday theme was also inspired by it and I had a dinosaur birthday.  

I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried my hand at an aerial taster class with one of my besties.  I managed to do some really amazing things, like get decently off the ground by climbing up the highest on the silks.  It was a lot of fun, and after the fact was very humbling, seeing as I was very sore...

I had my third round of jury duty, with my second time being picked.  Not my favorite experience, but it led up to Nicks proposal.

I made some new friends, reconnected with old ones, and lost one or two along the way as well.  I'm becoming more aware of who I want in my life, and when I need to either cut things off or pursue a relationship further. It's nice to feel comfortable as an adult sometimes!  

It was really a good year, but I'm ready for the new one.  There are so many challenges coming my way that I am so excited to be a part of!  From wedding planning, to new competitions for dance, to traveling, to getting things in order for my life with Fiancé, it's going to be a lot to handle.  However, I am up for the challenges!  Maybe tomorrow I will discuss more of what I am aiming my goals for 2016 to be!  

Life Lists

We all see them.

"25 things you NEED to do in your 20's."

"10 things you shouldn't have in your closet."

"30 things you should have by your 30s."

I hate these headlines.  Some of them can be pretty useful.  Yes you should be considering saving for your retirement, and yes you should travel by yourself at some point, and NO you should NOT be wearing that too tight bodycon dress with cutouts in the sides and the skirt so short you can see parts no one should see at the age of 30.  But many of THOSE are common sense.  What I don't like are those lists that persecute personal likes and dislikes.  

This thought process was brought about by an article I saw online today about 10 things that "need to stop" on Instagram.  For about half of them, I was totally guilty of doing.  Obligatory latte pic?  If it's pretty looking, you bet I'm going to post it!  It's like displaying a piece of coffee art.  Someone made it, and I bet they like their work being displayed.  It's appreciation, and recognition in the beauty of something simple.  It may not be the most creative, but it's my Instagram account.

Why do people feel so entitled to judge others online?  This drives me crazy.  I can't say that I am 100% innocent of this- I am in fact human and have my faults- but what I can't wrap my head around is the idea of people feeling like they can be a critic of others' personal choices because they spend too much time on social media and think that because of this it makes them an expert. If they stepped out of social media world for just a minute, they might actually realize that judging these other people doesn't make them better or more important.  It just kind of makes them jerks.  I realize the irony here is that I'm judging them, but it's to make a point.

I don't justify my life anymore by the choices that other people make.  I'm not in a race with anyone else to win at life, and I certainly do not have the average lifestyle of someone who has the thought process to make up a list of things you should/shouldn't do/have by age x.  I'm 31, and I like my life.  I like who I am and what I do.  There is always room for improvement, and there are always lessons to be learned, but I am not going to live my life by someone else's list.  Every person is on their own journey, and experiences things at different points.  Every experience is unique to the individual.  

So here is MY list for every day when I can-

1.  Be you.

2. Be confident in being you.

3.  Enjoy it.

4. Practice kindness.

5. Be mindful.

6. Allow yourself to feel your emotions.  

7. Be silly.

8. Laugh.

9. Love with all your soul.

10.  Follow your happiness.  

I think that about sums it up.  And if you don't like that list, make your own!  

The Day After Christmas

It's funny what Christmas becomes as we get older...

I'm sitting here on the day after Christmas rifling through different emotions.  As I look back on yesterday, I am so happy.  Everyone loved their presents that I gave them.  I did not win the Christmas pickle tradition, but am happy that Chantal was victorious.  Christmas Eve Eve brought many friends to us that made me smile.  The food was delicious, and the happiness that my family got from the beautiful meal my mom put together was overwhelming.  I am, as always, blown away by the amazing gifts my friends and family thought of to give me.  And nothing beats those moments when Fiancé would look at me and pull me in for a hug or a kiss, and all I could feel in those were love and joy.  

But now it's the day after Christmas.  The lights lose a bit of their sparkle.  The apartment looks like a tornado ran through it between the craziness leading up to Christmas, and the returning back home with almost as much stuff as we left with.  There is a ton of delicious food in the house- most of which I will feel guilty for eating in the next few days.  I miss having 2 fluffy puppies always getting in my face for rubs or playtime.  There's just a general feeling that this season went by too fast, and that somehow I didn't enjoy it enough in the moment.  

The good thing is that I still have a week of vacation.  Today is jam packed with friends and stuff to do.  Tomorrow we will see Nicks family again.  There is wedding planning to do, a day of reading on the couch, and figuring out New Years Eve.  Now I'm sitting here wondering if I will get time to relax...  

The moments that made me happiest were the simple ones.  Seeing my mom's face as we sat down for dinner and how good the meal was.  My sister fist-bumping me for "winning at Christmas".  My dads smile and laugh when he opened up the game I got for him and my mother.  Nick pulling me in for a hug. Texts from my friend Jess about her narwhal slippers, and texts from my friend Billy about his Christmas.  It wasn't the big crazy moments.  It was the small simple ones.  It was the feelings of contentment, and being with the people who matter.  

So overall, I guess after writing it out,  I'm feeling extremely happy about Christmas.  There is a small lingering sadness that it's over, but otherwise I am excited to get my vacation going!  

What was your favorite part of Christmas?   

The lights and the buzz...

Last night was a great night.  

Fiancé had a work dinner/Yankee swap that I was invited to go to.  It was near his work, which also happens to be some place he and I never go through.  He had been telling me about all the Christmas lights that he sees on his way home, and he had been saying he wanted to take me through his drive home so I could see them.  Well, last night was the perfect night for it.

I love driving around to see the Christmas lights.  Fiancé and I had never done a real drive like the one last night.  We'd been to a house in Danvers before that goes crazy with their lights and decorations, and we had noticed houses on our way to and from things, but never a proper drive.  It was totally worth it.

There was one area that Fiancé likes to refer to as "the McMansions."  Basically, they are these big beautiful houses that pretty much all look alike because some developer bought a section of land and built 12 of the same home...  If you disregard the fact that they all look the same, they were quite beautiful.  Most of them were adorned with simple white lights.  One house has a beautiful window right in the middle in the front of the house that displayed a beautiful Christmas tree.  Sometimes, the simplest decorations can be the prettiest.

I love Christmas lights and decorations.  Yes, I do love the sparkly and the pretty and the glittery and the shiny...  The thing I love the most, though, are the quick glimpses you get into people's lives.

During this time of year, people tend to leave more lights on.  Whether they have candles in the windows, lights up on the house, or they are simply leaving on lights in their homes to give the outside a better view of the tree, there is more illumination.  If you look closely at certain hours of the evening, you can catch moments of a person's life.   Last night on the way to the party, I saw a woman around my own age petting her cat in the window.  She had a simple smile on her face and she looked very content.  

You get these moments that almost seem like a scene in a movie.  Families are gathered around a tree.  Friends are having parties.  Older couples are coming home with gifts to wrap for the grandkids.  These moments seem fleeting as you drive by, and they have no idea that you have caught that little moment.  To them it's their life- to you, it's a few seconds.  Yet for me, it brings an immense amount of warmth and comfort.  I enjoy seeing people happy (at least I like to imagine that all the people I see are happy), and I love the Christmasy scenes that happen this time of year.  

Last night truly put me in the Christmas spirit, and I hope that everyone finds their thing that puts them in the cheeriest of moods!!  

Books

So I know it's Friday, and that means I'm supposed to be talking about food...  But I decided I wanted to talk about something different.

To begin with, I am a bookworm.  As a kid, I would sit for hours at home getting lost in my Nancy Drew or Babysitter's Club books.  At night, I would take my book lights and when my parents thought I was sleeping, I would be reading on to "just get to the next chapter."  Inevitably that meant I would get to the next chapter and keep reading.  When I would fly through schoolwork and finish before many of my peers, I would take out books and read them.  

In my adult life, I read as much as I can.  I don't read fast by any means.  I read between 10 and 15 books a year, but if I get going, I can fly through some.  Christmas of 2013, one of my best friends got me the Harry Potter series and even in one of my busiest dance seasons, I got through the series in a few months.  

I just finished a book yesterday, and was trying to figure out which book I would read next.  I have quite a few books on my Kindle that I have yet to read, and in my bookcase, so it's not for a lack of books that is slowing my next story adventure.  I just couldn't decide which one.

So I decided to do a quick experiment.  I posted on Facebook "So...what is your favorite book of all time?"  I sat back and have been getting some great answers.

It's really interesting to see what some people are saying.  Many of my friends I can look at their answers and think "yep, that totally makes sense."  Others have surprised me.  Some, I've never even read the books, and that has been awesome, because I can add it to my winter break list.  

I have a lot of books that I've loved.  Recently, The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt has been one of my favorites that has stayed with me. I read a book a few years back called Rule of the Bone that I adored at the time.  It was by Russell Banks and was a more modern day version of Catcher in the Rye.  I want to go back and read that at some point.  Certain books mean different things when we read them at different points in our lives.  I was in the throes of the "dark years" as I like to call them, when I read it.  

The one book that I have always loved for some reason is a book that my mom found one day at the book store.  I was in high school and she just came home with it for me randomly.  The book is called Looking for Alibrandi.  I read it more than once in high school, and I read it a couple times in my adult life.  I'll probably read it again soon since its been a few years and the details have faded.  I used a passage from it for a recitation project once, and it was one of the few books to make me cry (the first was Night by Eli Weisel, another one of my top favorites).  

I appreciated how many people responded.  It's nice to know that I still have many friends who love to read, and who are willing to share their love for books. There are so many books out there, and I have so little time, that I really love being able to get suggestions.  It's nice to get a glimpse into my friends' worlds as well.  There is so much you can learn from reading a person's favorite book.  

I am very much so looking forward to be able to dive into some of my friends' favorite selections soon and figure out if I like them or not.  I plan on more than one day on my break spent wrapped in blankets, a pot of coffee at the ready, getting lost in the books and going on written adventures with my friends. 

So...what's your all time favorite book? 

Mirror Monday!

Another Mirror Monday!!  Woo hoo!

Oh man, what do I see in the mirror today?

First of all, I see excitement.  Today begins the last week of classes for 2015 at the dance studio.  What a season so far!  I love my classes, and I am really looking forward to having some fun time with my recreational kids this week.  I'm also looking forward to the less strict classes and parties with my competition kids!

I am also excited that I get a whole day off to myself tomorrow. Fiancé will be gone for work, which means Christmas lights go on all day, Christmas movies play on loop, and I get to accomplish some gift wrapping!  That is, if I don't finish my Christmas cards today...

Second, I see a need for a detox.  I have not been eating well.  It's the time of year for super delicious food, and lots of fun beverage choices.  And I clearly don't know the meaning of portion control, though I need to learn.  I haven't been running either because there's always some chance of rain, and I HATE running in the rain!!!  I just wish it would either snow or stop raining.  I can't stand this in between stuff...

Third, I see a mess... Well, I see it not in the mirror but in my apartment.  Yesterday was a fun-filled and packed day of Christmas shopping.  Per usual, my apartment also got destroyed from the mere act of it being the weekend.  So I need to get on some cleaning!

Overall, I'm going into this week with a positive attitude.  Knowing that I have tomorrow off, and then I go on a 2 week winter break on Saturday definitely helps!

What do you see in your mirror today?  

Sunday Funday- Caterer Tasting!

It's Sunday Funday!  I've had a bit of a boring week when it comes to doing "fun" things.  I did have one event that I went to that Nick and I enjoyed.

We went to a catering tasting for our wedding!  Well, technically it wasn't for our wedding specifically, but rather a group of other couples.

It was held at Misselwood, which is where Fiancé and I are getting married.  Instead of doing it in the tent, though, we had it in the actual mansion.  And it was BEAUTIFUL!  It was decorated for Christmas with a tree in the front hallway, and the lighting was just perfect.  

I was a little nervous heading in because I had woken up that morning with half my face completely clogged up from a cold or virus or infection or SOMETHING. Either way, by 6pm, I still couldn't smell anything, and I was beyond tired.  I was nervous that I perhaps might not get the full flavor of the food since I wouldn't be able to smell it, but fortunately, it didn't matter.  As we started to be served food, all the flavors came through perfectly.  

Without getting into the food, though it was AMAZING and I think we've decided on a caterer, the experience itself was unique.  The owner of the company was there, explaining the food and giving tips on how to plan a wedding.  I was particularly impressed that the chef came out to say hello.  I was even more impressed when we were told that he was a certified butcher and all the cuts of meat were cut specifically by him.  As a foodie, and someone who has worked in restaurants and a country club that catered events, I was impressed.

The couples we sat with were all very nice.  Come to find out we are all getting married in August!  One couple was even getting married the Friday before us!  One couple had brought their parents, and the parents happened to live in the same city as us.  All I had to do was mention the well-known coffee shop by our apartment, and they started gushing about it!  As terrible as I was feeling, it was nice that the mother of the future bride carries the conversation a bit.  I was also very grateful to have Fiancé by my side.  He's going to be awesome at helping me with wedding stuff (don't tell him I said that though!). It's nice to have him want to be involved and want to make the decisions with me.  

The evening ended with us tasting cakes, and then we headed out to go home.  The owner sent us off with cookies (which were DELISH!) and Fiancé and I walked away feeling super full, and super happy!  

I hope everyone had a bit of fun in their week as well!  

Just What I've Always Wanted

Song lyric Saturday!  I'm pretty sure this is only the second one I've ever managed to remember...  I'm very impressed with myself since I have a very long day ahead!  

Today's lyrics are from a winter classic- Jack Frost.  It's one of those Bass and Rankin claymation movies.  It just happens to be on while I'm typing this...  Hehe

So to set up the scene, and to explain the reasoning behind me choosing this song in particular- Jack Frost wants to be human, so Father Winter has granted him a time period to collect some human essentials.  If he does not complete his list by the end of winter, he is to remain Jack Frost forever.  This scene in particular is with the family that has taken him in.  It's Christmas, and the family, as well as the entire village, is poor, so they give each other "dream presents."  An empty box is placed on the table.  Each person gives it to another.  They open the box and imagine it as being something they've always wanted.  They take it out and play with it or try it on.  

I think this is something wonderful to think about and consider this time of year.  There are many out there who don't have the money to give each other gifts, or are able to provide what we consider a normal Christmas for their family.  Even though it is just a movie, I think it's really beautiful that these people got together and had some fun pretending so that they still had an enjoyable Christmas.  Sometimes in terrible situations, we have to remember that it's not about what we have, or even what we can physically give.  It's about being together, and enjoying experiences with those you love. 

While the song itself I guess is pretty superficial, the sentiment behind it is what I'm going for today.

Just What I've Always Wanted

Jack: You shouldn't have, you didn't

Oh my, oh my

I really don't deserve it
I think I'll cry
It's just what I always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what I always wanted
A Christmas delight

Everyone: It's just what he always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what he always wanted
A Christmas delight

Elisa: I hoped you wouldn't bother
Oh my, oh my
I'll use it every morning
I think I'll cry
It's just what I always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what I always wanted
A Christmas delight

Everyone: It's just what she always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what she always wanted
A Christmas delight

Mama: It's absolutely charming
Oh my, oh my
The coloring just suits me
I think I'll cry
It's just what I always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what I always wanted
A Christmas delight

Everyone: It's just what she always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what she always wanted
A Christmas delight

Papa: It's simply too expensive
Oh my, oh my
I'll treasure it forever
I think I'll cry
It's just what I always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what I always wanted
A Christmas delight

Everyone: It's just what he always wanted
It's perfectly right
It's just what he always wanted
A Christmas delight

Are there any Christmas songs from movies that particularly put you in the spirit of the holidays?  

The Gingerbread Volcanoes

It's Foodie Friday!  Huzzah!

This week's topic is moreso a bit of a story, rather than a recipe...

Let's start off by clarifying that yesterday was not my day.  Nothing monumentally disastrous happened, but a series of annoying events led to me feeling like I just didn't want continue with the day and rather fast forward to the next.  

So towards the beginning of the day, after a few annoyances happened (one incident being stabbing a hole in my kitchen faucet by accident), I decided that I would resort to something that made me feel like there was order in my world, and would take my mind off things.  I decided to make gingerbread.  I've done this annually for a few years around Christmas.  I found this great cake-y recipe that is just simply delicious.  The recipe is certainly not complicated either.  So I set out to start the baking.  All goes well, and I even decide that I'm going to make individual serving sizes instead of one big pan.  I figured I could work it with the mindset of cake vs. cupcake and deal with baking times and filling up the baking dishes in that manner.

I put all the little mini gingerbreads in the oven set on a baking pan, and I set the timer.  My mom calls in the meantime and we start having a conversation about all the annoyances of my day.  Mid-conversation, the timer goes off.  This was just meant to be a check in time anyway.  Still on the phone, I throw on an oven mit and open the oven...

Thank goodness I put a baking pan under those bad boys, because gingerbread was pouring over the sides of the dishes like hot lava down the side of a volcano.  

If you look carefully, you can see the explosion.  

All I did was stare at it for about 30 seconds, closed the oven door, and walked away.  In all my years of making the gingerbread, it had never risen to such heights, and had never cascaded over.  I told my mom what had happened and basically she giggled at it.  

Fortunately, when the gingerbread was done, I tried it, and it actually came out very well.  It's just going to be a nightmare when I eventually have to clean those dishes.  Hardened molasses-based gingerbread will be a scary ordeal to clean off...  

All in all, I can't wait to sit down with the gingerbread to have as my dessert.  I'm just really happy that I only have to scrape off the crusts from a pan, and not from the bottom of my oven!

Have you ever had a silly baking disaster?  

Oh Christmas Tree...

Ok I'm BACK!  I kind of let this go the wayside from Thanksgiving onward.  It's a busy time of year for the dance studio as we approach our "winter break."  Basically that means we are scrambling to finish dances, clean the ones we've already choreographed, take time to try on costumes that have come in, keep the rec kids interested and involved, and try to remain calm as the Christmas crazies kick in.  There are extra rehearsals, more time spent listening to music for recitals, and making sure everything is set and we're all in good places before we have 2 weeks off.  Add in my personal life of Christmasy events, Christmas shopping, Christmas cards, a minor cold, trying to keep the apartment from looking like a tornado has ripped through it, and keeping Nick and I fed with healthier options than take out, my life has been a little busy!  

I am back now, though, and I'm hoping to keep up better with this, particularly since I figured out how to write an entry from my phone!  Yay technology!  

So, it's Throwback Thursday!  Yay!  What keeps popping up on my Facebook is Christmas trees, and in my "On This Day" section, various Christmas trees of yore keep popping up as well.  So I'm going to share one of my FAVORITE tree pictures.  

This is from when I lived with my darling  Cj.  That is my lovely little tree.  Hanging from the star is Jack Skellington (which was Cj's idea, and I now try to do every year). Behind the tree is David Tenant.  No, not the real one, though, that would be amazing. It's a cardboard cut out of him as the tenth doctor in Doctor Who.  Wrapped around him is a sparkly sash that Cj had procured on a trip to Vega.  One of us put the Santa hat on him.  Whether it was me, Cj or Fiancé, I cannot recall.  That was probably one of my favorite years decorating the tree.  I know I had come home from work and began pulling out the decorations.  I believe eggnog was involved, Christmas music, and lots of laughter.  I also have a strong memory of being on the floor by the tree as Cj read through a book I got my sister that was all about different ailments and what deadly disease it could be (it'd be funnier and less horrifying if you knew my sister the hypochondriac).  I don't remember specifically if this memory was on the same day as the decorating, but it might have been.  

The thing of it is, this is one of my favorite trees because of the love and laughter that went with it.  Not to say that I don't have that now, but there was something about that time period in that apartment. It was really special and something that I will always treasure. 

So...I'm hoping to stay on top of all this in a better fashion, and the blog will begin to breathe life again.  Hopefully someone will eventually read this!  

What was your favorite Christmas tree memory?